life in the crotch

Get your gag reflexes ready....

2009-02-10T10:40:00.000-08:00

Busy Monday cranks right into insane Tuesday. And then I received this little email from my husband:

"So I keep getting these stupid facebook '25 things you didn't know' messages from people, and frankly I could give a shit if people knew 25 things about me. But it got me thinking of 25 things I love about you that go unsaid in my daily confessions of love for you. So here is my 25 things you didn't know that I love about you: (with a few edits- hey, we've got to have a little mystery!)

1. Your Feet- (ewww)

2. Your British accent. It's pretty awesome

3. They way you bring words to life

4. The smell of your hair after a shower

5. Your undying creative spirit to fill my belly with delicious food

6. You are so brilliant and yet you question it, makes you even smarter to me

9. That you tell me how sexy I am. It makes me feel really good about myself.

10. That you eat things in layers. It's one of the weirdest but cutest things you do.

13. The future. WIthout you in my life the idea of the future seems dark and boring.

14. When you sing. I love your voice. And I love that you think Alicen is a better singer then you. It makes me laugh

15. How honest you opinions are about my art. WIthout you I think I would produce a lot of shitty starfish =)

16. For a life worth living for. Even at times when the tunnel seems to be closing in on me, I can hear your voice and know that I will be ok

19. Your family. You have a family that has welcomed me and made me feel so special.

20. That you rock the shit out of Guitar Hero. It's super hot. no joke

22. That you are awesome at extreme sports and I suck balls at them. Again very hot.

23. That you are my home. And I have love and comfort in life that many people struggle to find.

25. You being you. That is reason enough for me, you are a honest person that I look up to in so many more ways than these 25. I love you."

........swoon. Damn. I better think of an AMAZING V-day gift. Any ideas?

Hi, it's me

2009-02-05T10:05:00.000-08:00

Hi, it's me.
I'm still here.
barely.....

After contant complaints of the barely bearable weather, continuous dog training, adjusting to work, Josh's strange ailment where an iphone has spontaneously grown in place of his ear, new awesome season of Lost, a sudden urge to go swing dancing, and delicious new recipes, you would think I have so much to blog about I'm bursting with ideas. And trust me, I am!

But, DAMN! I need a vacation. I'm at lunch now, but I will talk to y'all when I get home. Just thought I'd send you a teaser that my wheels are a turning!

Achie in the Snow

2009-01-19T17:09:00.000-08:00

Mommy may be complaining about the cold. But this little guy is doing just fine....

That is, as long as he has his super sweet, hip and stylin' argyle sweater.....

Lookin' sharp Buddy!

Have you ever...?

2009-01-16T10:25:00.000-08:00

Have you ever walked outside and suddenly thought you might have giant boogers dangling out of your nose, but when you checked for any "bats in the cave" you realized that all moisture in your nostrils has frozen into dangling boogerific crystals?

Have you ever envied an eskimo knowing that his home made of enormous ice cubes is warmer than your own insulated, heat-included, ice box of an apartment?

Have you ever thought amputation was a possible solution to make walking easier than tripping over those clumsy frozen stubs other people call toes?

Have you ever resented a catch up phone call with a friend knowing the warmth in their voice, although coming with love, sounds more like a menacing taunt?

Have you ever known what it would feel like to have your skin doused in gasoline and set afire and still thought that would be nothing compared to the burning feeling of a -13 degree chill?

..... then you must be a Chicagoan!

And if you do have Chicago Pride, check out this shirt Josh designed. Middle Coast what what!

Puppy Poo Year!

2009-01-03T16:55:00.000-08:00

Or does it go Yap and Chew Year? I don't know any more cuz my new year has started with a brand new puppy!

Yea, sorry I haven't written in a while, but puppy training is tough. I've been really focusing on giving the new dog all my attention and love and affection.... uh oh.....looks like someone wants to cuddle..... down, Josh, down! (someone is a little jealous!)

Well, without further delay
Meet Archie

"Hi, I'm Archie, short for Archer. That's my daddy's favorite typeface.....whatever that means."

He is a 2 year old chihuahua/fox terrier mix that we rescued from a shelter here in Illinois. His temperament is so sweet and he loves to cuddle. We chose him because of his calm energy and the way he loved to be held like a baby. Already he can sit, understands how to use his crate, and is housebroken.... well, sort of.....

I could use some help with that one, especially from those of you with small dogs. We have shown him that we are reliable pack leaders and he is quite submissive. He sits on command, focuses on us during a walk, lets us walk in doorways before he does, waits for permission to eat and shows his belly when he wants attention; however, he might be a little too submissive and to show us he needs a confidence boost, he pissed on a wall to mark his territory! Ahhhhhh! Since he is a rescue, we have no idea what his history is and I am really trying to build his trust and confidence (without sacrificing my fine home goods!). Any suggestions?

"I know, Mommy, why don't you let me sleep in your bed and you get the crate!?"

Have any of you ever adopted? Let me know your experiences, it will surely help with mine! Until then, back to the cat-nap--I mean, puppy-nap!

HOME

2008-12-22T08:26:00.000-08:00

My husband is an artist. The kind of artist that stops what he is doing in the middle of dinner and goes, "OH MAN! I just thought of an amazing piece." He scribbles on a napkin and goes right back to his plate of food. Days later he will show me the work in progress, this unbelievable, fantastic, makes-your-eyes-pop-out-of-your-head, ART. Well, most recently he and Colby (his other partner in life) otherwise known as "JOLBY" began working on some pieces for his new show coming up, called "Home Is Where You Make It."

They are constantly inspired by their own surroundings, and this show portrays the emotions they have each felt as they struggle to grasp the meaning of "home." Even now as I try to write it out, I have no idea what home really means to me. A place I feel welcome, a place I am comfortable, a place I go to sleep? I think the boys have the right idea, it is too hard to put into words..... Maybe this will help

Finally, today we are headed home....

Do's and Dont's of Unemployment

2008-12-19T12:48:00.000-08:00

Let's face it, this recession isn't clearing up anytime soon. And sadly, a few of us may be losing jobs as our country spirals further into the depths of this economic downturn. Now, should this happen, and of course we all hope it doesn't, there is no reason to huddle in a bomb shelter waiting out toxic economic fallout. I have bravely endured a difficult unemployment streak for you so that you don't have to learn the hard way (if there is one...) So here it is:

Do's and Dont's of Unemployment

DO: Wake up before noon. (Look, jobbers-don't judge us, we have no reason to wake up early so why not sleep?) The key is to not overdo it. You want to make sure you are still setting a time frame that is "appropriate." Sleeping too late messes up your circadian rhythms so you stay up into the wee hours of the night obsessively stalking-- I mean-- reading Ashley's blogs wishing you were somehow that freaking cool.

DONT: Call your husband many times during his workday just to relive the conversations you just had with your mother. And why not? Well, because what are you going to talk about when he gets home from a long day at work, silly! Nothing makes him happier than to come home to a bored wife with an hour's worth of replayed conversation.

DO: Create tasks for yourself throughout the day. Something like going to the grocery store may seem like a tedious task for others, but to you it is the essential function of the day to show you are contributing. And for goodness sakes, drag it out, I mean sure you can probably finish in less than an hour, but then you've got nothing to do for the rest of the day. Linger at the sample station, ask the deli counter for taste tests, engage the butcher in a recipe exchange. Trust me, grocery shopping quickly becomes your favorite activity.

DONT: Call your working friends during the day and ask "watcha doin?" This surely annoys them. Instead, just chat with them over AIM. They still may be annoyed for the interruption, but I have found they are more likely to talk for a very long time because the typing makes them sound busy. For instance, one friend is supposed to be saving the country from natural disasters and such, so when I call him on the phone he answers with a professionally hushed voice saying "kinda busy, what's up." However, ask him over instant message what he had for lunch and you would think D.C. has shut down for all the important details of "turkey on wheat."

DO: Change out of your pajamas. In my experience, if you walk outside to get the mail wearing polka-dotted flanels at 4:15 and say "Hi, how are you?" to the neighbor, it more or less traslates to "Hey, what are you looking at? It's not like I'm building a homemade explosives in the basemet, I just happen to have eaten and entire roll of cookie dough as my only meal today.... Shut up."

DONT: Eat an entire roll of cookie dough. It's not pretty.

DO: Oh, yea. Look for a job. I mean, after all this other stuff is taken care of.

Good Luck! Stick to these simple rules and you should have no problem dealing with the unbearable hassle of sitting at home all day while your husband goes to work and supports you. It's a tough life, but at least now you know how to survive! You're welcome.

Jealous Much?

2008-12-16T12:37:00.000-08:00

rrrrrrrrriiiiiinnnnngggg, rrrrrrrrriiiiiiinnnnnnngggggg.....
(my phone actually vibrates but just go with it)

Me: Hello, my darling, how is your day going?

The Hubs: uhg.

Me: Oh, that is a shame. I happen to be watching the snow gently cover the neighborhood, wrapped up in a wool blanket, drinking hot chocolate, tuned into a nutcracker marathon on TV. My day really sucks too....(*snicker*)

Is there already a St. Joshua?

2008-12-12T08:52:00.000-08:00

I have a confession to make. Sometimes I think I am clever. On occasion, I get so full of myself I will pose in our office doorway looking for attention, and say, "Josh, don't I look cute?" or "Josh, do you hate it that I'm so funny?"

I know, you are slightly smiling but more wincing at my inflated ego and merciless arrogance, but trust me, those moments are few and far between, because more often than not this overconfidence gets me in trouble and I am shamefully humbled. This a trait that only my wonderful and patient husband can handle. And to be honest, I have done a lot of humiliating and stupid things that Josh surprisingly never throws in my face...

Like the time when I thought I would play a practical joke on him by convincing him that West Virginia is actually south of Virginia.

Like the time I thought it would be a silly little joke to touch his arm with a hot curling iron.

Like the time I drove all the way to Indiana, screaming "I KNOW WHERE I AM GOING" before I realized I'd driven an hour into the wrong state.

Like the time I thought I would karaoke "Dancing in the Streets" at a very intimate, very quiet restaurant filled with confused Hawaiians and one supportive/embarrassed husband.

Like the time I tackled him into a snowdrift that actually hid a very hard curb and broke his rib.

Like the time I posted a picture of his face decorated as a basset hound.

Like the time I...... All I can say is...

THANK GOD THIS GUY MARRIED ME!

I GOT THE JOB!

2008-12-11T10:43:00.000-08:00

Actually re-enactment of my face when I finally got that call..... "We'd like to offer you the position."

So much relief, so much satisfaction, so much conversation when I go home for the holidays. You know what I mean, all your old friends and distant family members asking the age old question, "So what have you been up to?" I swear on everything holy that I would have probably bitten off my own pinky finger for the shock value before I had to answer "Oh, nothing really. Still unemployed, but I'll tell you what, our laundry pile has never looked smaller!"

There is a GOD! And he has blessed me with a mother-fucking-happy-days-are-here-again-oh-shit-my-grandma-reads-this---- wonderful, well-paying, growth-filled, career.

Ahhhhhh........

DIY Christmas: Coming Soon to a X-mas Near You

2008-12-09T17:07:00.000-08:00

I love being creative. Handmade gifts are truly the mark of love. The fact that someone would take the time to personally make a gift instead of pick it up at the local ipod vending machine (seriously, they have those) means a lot. So with a longer-than-hoped run of unemployment, the Kenyons are going DIY!

I have attempted this at the holidays in the past and.... to be honest, they are not items I would like to give away as gifts. Nevertheless, I pulled them out and decorated the tree with the handmade ornaments that "only a mother could love." Take a look at a couple of my DIY Christmas blunders from last year:

These ornaments were a special project in an effort to customize our Christmas tree. Here are instructions so that you too can create these wonderful timeless decorations for yourself to brighten up everyone's holiday. Even the Jews.

1. Mix together flour and water and salt. I don't really know the proportions but it can't really make too much of a difference, right? It should make a doughy paste, well more doughy then pasty.

2. Make stuff.

3. Bake it for like an hour, it seriously takes forever.

4. And the best part is painting it. Get creative. Here, I used a deep sea blue, but you can use any color in the rainbow. See? It's so easy and versatile! And not to mention.... beautiful.

(no joke, this is actually hanging on my tree)

This one is supposed to represent our love for CA.
As you can see, its beauty rivals the true magic of the California coast.

Here is another precious example of the Kenyon creativity at its best. Maybe you have heard of the genius behind my husband's artistic skill. Well, here you can see one of his other collaborations with his wife. I decided we could decorate clear balls with our own style, problem is the paint never dried and instead created this wishy-washy half-colored ornament.

Now that I have mastered DIY Christmas projects I have spent my time dreaming up new ways to share this joy with our friends and family.
You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why. The Kenyons are coming to town! Bearing DIY gifts!

Snow Day

2008-12-08T16:51:00.000-08:00

Roads Closed. Schools Shut. Rules were made to be frozen!

YEA! uh......What they said! Josh and I won't be stopped by a few inches of snow! We're gonna freeze all the rules!

Josh wanted me to climb up this tree to get a cute shot...

... my ugg boots definitely aren't for climbing. He caught this one just as I was falling off the branch.

Hurry up, it's ccccccoooooollllldddd.

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.
That is, until Thursday. Then, you know, I'm over it. So if you could just skip all this cold stuff that would be great. Thanks.

Josh's Last Words: Woof Woof

2008-12-04T15:34:00.000-08:00

So I thinking all day what I should do to inspire a little change and rumple some feathers a little but didn't come up with anything too crazy- I ended up wearing a somewhat "brave" outfit. (I forgot to take a picture so you will have to imagine it). I wore a pair of gray plaid shorts, cute black blouse, black boots and here it is--- pink tights! As I examined myself in the mirror I was quite impressed with the funky/eclectic look, my husband came home and took one look at me and said...

Oh, you look....interesting.

Are you kidding me!?! Now, Josh does not get himself into trouble too often, but this one left me cold for quite a while, despite the chilly weather. Even though I knew better than to make a big deal out a man's evaluation of fashion, I still reacted slightly hurt. Which leads me to my question. Should we women brush off men when they so often use the wrong words? Or was my reaction warranted? Or the bigger question I suppose is, was the criticism just due to a possibly foolish decision in clothing choice?

Until I get some answers, Mr. Kenyon is living in the DOG HOUSE!

Do One Thing Every Day That Scares You. And start TODAY!

2008-12-02T20:56:00.000-08:00

Eleanor Roosevelt once said this infamous quote that is now plastered on library walls and scripted in flowery journals and regurgitated in hallmark greeting cards so often that it has lost its true meaning. This empowered woman didn't just say this in an effort to inspire cowardly friends to expand their horizons. The woman truly did things that would terrify me even when I am feeling unabashedly brazen, such as the time I helped a clearly psychotic homeless man lug his oak dining room chair up the escalator at the Washington 'L' stop. For goodness sakes, she married her fifth cousin and became his "legs" so that he could remain politically active! Now that takes guts!

So, why bring you this brief history lesson? Because I want to rescue this over-used, watered-down, cliched-out quote. And the only way I know how to do what ol' Ellie says is to do something that scares me-- TODAY! And guess what the scarier part is? YOU have to do it too! Yup, now that I have dared you, you can't chicken out. Triple Dog Dare you!
You have 24 hours to report back to me your accomplished "scare tactic."

Hmmm, now let's see. I am scared of:

1. Josh's feet before bed when they are really cold and the toe nails are all long and gangley.

2. Josh's reaction when he realizes I have posted that

3. Leaving the side door open so that an axe murderer might come in and hide in my closet (according to my landlord).

4. Farting in public- seriously, I may or may not let them rip at home, but only Josh truly knows ;)

5. Really pursuing my dream of writing

6. Trying out for roller derby. I got approached by a friend that wanted me to do it, and I chickened out. I found every excuse in the book but really I was just too yellow-bellied.

7. Hurting people with my sometimes tactless opinions.

8. Presenting my resume to a company in person- this one is pertinent because I really am getting desperate for a job.

9. Buying the homeless man under the bridge a sandwich to keep him warm in 30 degree weather

10. Dying my hair black.

oh wait I already did! Check it

The point is our lives are as malleable as fresh clay being kneaded and molded by a skilled potter and as soon as we stop adapting and challenging ourselves, we are like the lump of clay that has been neglected and set to harden and dry out instead of being molded into a beautiful piece of art for all to enjoy.

As for me, I have a date with the vagabond under the bridge, what terrifying feat are you up to today?

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to your self, I’ve lived through this horror I can take the next thing that comes along. -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Alright, I've been busy

2008-10-06T16:25:00.000-07:00

I know, I have no reason to crawl back to my faithful bloggy followers to win over your hearts once again, but I still have to try. I am well aware that you are not interested in excuses, but I do want to remind you that I have been extremely busy. I mean, I am working at the Obama Headquarters over 50 hours a week, for goodness sakes, I am trying to get a black man to be president! Cut me some slack! :)

Anyways, I'm here to tell you that I have already begun another blog. But this one is a joint effort with my hubby. I figure with his accountability, I will HAVE so write something every time he cracks his whip! (hahaha, yea like that's how it works :)) So check out our latest adventures.

Right now, I am writing you from Singapore and can't wait to tell you all about the next adventures to come!

check it:

thekenyonreview.blogspot.com

muah! miss you! xxoxXoxX
(keess, keess, hug, keess, Big Keess, little hug, little keess, Big Keess)

I'm Back Baby!

2008-08-28T09:18:00.000-07:00

I had to take a break. I just had to.

But here I am. Crawling out of my summer hibernation to tell you about my amazing husband and his artwork.

So check it out. Josh designed a fabulous tee for a design contest and NEEDS your votes. I know, I am like the prodigal son returning and asking for favors, but don't do it for me, do it for this incredible artist!

The link:

http://www.designbyhumans.com/vote/detail/25213

http://jolby.blogspot.com/

If you vote, I will promise you a double decker strawberry ice cream cone and tons of blogalicious gems to come....

LIKE A BAT OUTTA HELL!

2008-07-31T09:05:00.000-07:00

Oh yes! It's MEATLOAF!

My mom and my dad both make KILLER meatloaf. I mean really.

HEY- I see that face! Don't stick your tongue out and cringe! You wouldn't know until you tried it, so put your pre-conceived notions aside! Yea, I'm talking to you...

So last night I busted out the top secret recipe, assembled the ingredients, washed my hands thoroughly, rolled up my sleeves and started mushing up meat.

Half-way through, raw ground turkey squishing through my fingers, I realized I was missing a couple items essential to the recipe. Problem is I am not one to give up, or to just hop over to the grocery store and pick up the missing ingredients.... I improvise!

(Mom, you may be horrified by this...)

The cardinal seasoning, onion soup mix, was nowhere to be found. So, I search the pantry and find a package of Rice a Roni: chicken and mushroom flavor. Hmm... close enough- Out with the "flavor pack," into the mix!

Ok, Josh, I need the meatloaf pan...

What do you mean, you can't find it?

Is it under that other--

Oh yea, I forgot. We don't have one.

So, yet again, I got creative....

Alright, so that looks like a really fucked up bunt cake, but let me tell you, Josh even agreed, it is the best meatloaf I have ever made!

Where there's a will there's a way!

And where there is Shannon, there is some damn good meatloaf!

Swing Life Away

2008-07-25T09:39:00.001-07:00

You know what I have realized? I can do anything if I put my mind to it. YOU can do anything, if you focus your energy to attain that goal. Case in point: Swing Dancing!

I entered a drawing for free swing dance classes last month and won. But I don't say it's because I am lucky. I specifically asked the universe for them....

"Whoa, whoa, WHOA! Slow down!" you say.

Ok, I'll start over. Josh and I have always wanted to take swing dance classes, but due to life's complications, always put it off. While wandering a Chicago festival, I saw a booth with a chance to win free classes, I entered myself immediately (and Josh too for extra support!) I turned to Josh and said, "Get Ready, we are gonna be SWINGERS!" (wink).

Later that week, someone suggested I enter into another drawing to win a free lunch, but my response surprised her,

I can't, I have to put all my energy into winning those swing classes. I have to stay focused on that.

Two days later I got the call. And now, after three weeks of hand passes and rock steps and we are like Fred and Ginger!

I know it sounds a little like Peter Pan asking you to say you believe in fairies, but, give it a try.
Put your positive energy out there, and really believe. See what great things waltz (or should I say, lindy hop) into your life!

Look Mom, No Hands!

2008-07-17T08:10:00.000-07:00

My brother and his girlfriend are visiting from that far off land in the west. This place they call, Coleeforna... (oh, how soon we forget!) jk :)

Haven't had much time to blog it up, but here is what we've been up to so far.

Lifetime. Not just television for women.

2008-07-12T18:11:00.000-07:00

July 12, 2007. Josh and I drove east on 90/94 and beheld the skyline that would represent our new home exactly one year ago today. Like vagabonds, we carried few personal items and sat in traffic trembling with the reality that this overwhelming, clattering gem of a city would be a place we call "home." If that was even possible. All we knew was California, the Golden State. It was safe. It was comfortable. It was easy. It was our entire world.

And we left it all behind.

As I sit at the computer trying to recall the emotions and feelings I was going through exactly 365 days ago, I am coming up short. I can't even remember that sort of anxiety Chicago brought me back then. It seems like a lifetime ago.

Lifetime. People use that phrase all the time, but what does that really mean? Usually we interpret it as an entire period when you were a "different person." When you had a completely different set of familiarities and responsibilities and perspectives. We have this inkling that you must be born and then die to be reincarnated into your next life, in your next lifetime.

Hmmm... maybe in my last life I was a spandex-laden, cactus green coiffed, scratchy-toned 80's rock singer at the height of my career only to cut it short in a freak performance accident where I was convinced a flock of Sharp-shinned hawks could carry me over the crowd while I displayed dazzling acrobatics, only to realize too late that hawks do not travel in flocks... oops! I guess that might explain my obsession with the 80's and my fearful yet curious aversion to fowl.

When i googled "80's rock star" to find a pic that would illustrate my former self, this guy came up. hahahaha i can't stop laughing! I mean, poor Doofus McScragglyface has to put this in his modeling portfolio! hahahaha. If i were his friend I would just email this to him every few days just to remind him of this glorious moment when he answered a misleading ad:

"Model needed. 80's glamor rock. Please wear awkward flannel."

And of course, Doofus, who loves my silly ideas and ridiculous obsessions but must constantly deal with my raggedly inappropriate sense of humor and painfully jabbing insults, would roll his eyes at me like he always does and respond,

"C'mon Shan, let it rest. That was a lifetime ago!"

Lifetime. Maybe it's not really that long afterall. Maybe a lifetime isn't what we think of as the traditional cycle of birth than death of the physical body. Maybe it is, in fact, when we had a completely different set of familiarities and responsibilities and perspectives, but within our current human experience. It is the major changes we make that propel us into this next lifetime, an era that we are willing to learn a completely different set of values and ideas. A time when we realize our former self is gone, and we are new and fresh and reborn.

Yes, I think it's coming back to me now. I know exactly what I was in my last life. I was a terrified, naive, newlywed, sunshiny Californian trading in one lifetime for another. It was a cool July evening with the sunsetting behind twinkling office buildings instead of over the vast ocean. And my old life was gone, I was never filled with more hope.

Summertime, and the Livin' is Easy...

2008-07-10T09:42:00.000-07:00

A-one. A-two-hoooo. A-three.

2008-07-08T01:46:00.000-07:00

CRUNCH>three.

Have you ever gotten those cheesy name cards they sell at drug store counters that spell your name in flowery script, then the meaning of that name below it?
You know what I'm talking about. Anywayz.

I was always disappointed in mine. Shannon: Small but wise.

Bleh. I wanted something like Warrior Princess, or Summer's Beauty, or Ever Young...

But I was always stuck with "small but wise." As a kid, I envisioned a bookish little girl with glasses and a sharp tongue who always was the first to raise her hand in class. Not an exquisite dancer and all around garish leader such as how I envisioned my 10-year-old self.

I have not pondered this misnomer, as I would have preferred to think it as, in years. But for some odd reason, I was compelled to research the meaning behind this yet again. I don't know if it has something to do with the "rebirth" I have been going through as I come to grips with the tail end of a "quarter life crisis" or perhaps just one of those weird hunches I get that keep me up all night until satisfied. Either way, it is exactly 4:01 AM and I am researching the origin of my first name.

I first see "Shannan: Ancient God" and immediately think, Alright! Now we're talking! So Saugus Drugs was wrong all these years, I am indeed the Godly creature I have always believe myself to be! (snicker).

Then I come across "Shannen: God's Gracious Gift." Ah Ha! Even better, not the lofty arrogance of actually being a god, simply a beautiful gift from God to bring joy to the world! (hang on, hold your gag reflex, I have yet to get to my true meaning of my name...)

But alas, right on cue I find the words that have defined me, despite my willingness to recognize: Shannon: Little Wise Owl.

sigh. What can this possibly mean? I HATE BIRDS! I mean except for the big expressive eyes, I just don't see the resemblance. Disappointed, I begin to google the symbolism of an owl, hoping to shed some insight to my dashed dreams. This is what I find:

Throughout many cultures, the symbolic meaning of owl deals with:

intelligence
brilliance
perspective
intuition
quick-wit
independence
wisdom
protection
mystery
power

Native American tribes (primarily plains’ Indians) viewed the owl as a protector against harm and their feathers were ritually worn to ward of evil spirits.

Ancient Athenians made the owl an emblem of wisdom and even emblazoned the image of the owl on their coinage. To the ancient Greeks, the owl is a symbol of Athene who is goddess of foresight & knowledge.

Taking symbolism from the owl directly, it is noteworthy that it is a creature of the night. Nocturnal creatures are symbolic of inner-knowing, psychic ability, and intuition - so too is the owl.

If an owl has visited you, an incredible gift has been bestowed. Also, keep in mind that animals are only called to those who share the same energy. In other words, you hold within you some of the very same symbolic attributes the owl represents. The owl may be trying to tell you to develop your intuition further.

To illustrate, you may have abilities to know things that others do not know. It may be likely you have very strong intuitive abilities that can be fine-tuned. Further, you may be strong-willed person, and/or have a protective side to you.

Owls also show themselves as a sign of warning (no, not of death). You simply need to pay close attention to people around you - owls are incredibly perceptive - you are probably perceptive too - use your powers of perception around new people you may meet. Not everyone is as nice, or “cool” as they seem to be.

Maybe being small but wise isn't so bad afterall... Except for the nocturnal part. I mean who blogs until 4:30 in the morning, honestly!

What does YOUR name mean? Check it out, you might discover something you never knew.

Oh, and for those of you that really know me, this should freak you out: Did you know there is a butterfly called an "owl butterfly." Seriously, look it up.

Wanna go for a Ride?

2008-07-07T10:16:00.000-07:00

Merrick: Wanna go for a ride in my brand new Jeep?

Shan: Sure. Can I jump through the side window?

Merrick: No

Shan: Can I stand up while your driving?

Merrick: No

Shan: Can I sit in front and lean out the window winking at other lamer cars as we pass?

Merrick: No

Shan: (offended) This doesn't sound like any fun at all!

Merrick: (unchanged expression) Wanna go or not?

Shan: hmmmm..... HECK YES!

Shan: Now, can I jump through the side window?

Merrick: No

Declaring Independence

2008-07-04T09:30:00.000-07:00

You know what's great about Americans?

(I just had to suppress a thousand images of boasting cowboys, eating ribs and watching football while driving oversize cars to move forward to my point... trying.... so.... hard... not to..... make.... fat joke....)

Today, we celebrate. Not a military victory, not a birthday of an influential leader, not the day this great nation gained respect from the world.

Fuck no! Today we celebrate rebellion! Today we celebrate rejecting the path we were "supposed" to follow! Today we celebrate the fact that our defiant forefathers shouted,
"FUCK YOU! I QUIT!"

Like incorrigible adolescents who think their brains are fully capable of making life-altering adult decisions, these revolutionaries said, "You know what mother, I don't need you anymore! I'm moving out!"

And more than 300 years later, we still appreciate the fact that sometimes taking a risk and doing it on your own is hard. Like REALLY hard. But in the end, it is worth the fight. It is worth the learning experience and it is worth the pain, because even if you fail, you still get to celebrate the fact that you believed in yourself and declared your independence. No matter the outcome.

GOD BLESS AMERICA. LAND OF THE FREE.

The Señors of Marseille

2008-07-03T09:44:00.000-07:00

"The run they fall they reach and they crawl, all over you."

These scallywags really know how to blow shit up!

I'm talking about "The Senors of Marseille."

This upstart duo turned trio from the great city of Brooklyn, New York, spins harmonious euphonies that caught me off guard as I tried to place where I had heard this familiar yet alien sound. These haunting, untraceable melodies permanently lodged themselves into the depths of my cerebrum as I drifted to sleep last night, and I have yet to pry them from my subconscious. So here I sit, musing over their inspired verses and daydreaming of what I would be like if I too gave it all up to follow my dreams.

Dreams that maybe I never knew I had, until, well, I had a lot of unemployed time to mull it over. In fact, it might be useful to carelessly write out a public list of fantasies. Hmm, yes, let's give it a try:

List of Dreams
by Shan

See my face on a "Jumbotron" at a major sporting event

Learn how to sail. I want to respond to the command, "Bring 'er 'round the port side!" and know what that means.

Have someone I have never met tell me I changed their life.

Receive a standing ovation after a rockin' karaoke performance, that leads to a talent scout telling me this exact phrase: "You really got something there, kid"

Dressing like a chimney sweep on the set of Mary Poppins and kicking my knees up to "Step in Time" with Julie Andrews laughing the entire time

Teaching English in a foreign country

Telling stories of my incredible travels to adoring grandchildren

Surrounding myself with people that understand and respect me for exactly who I am

And most importantly, finding my purpose in life

Ahhh, that felt good. what is on your life list?

They tried to make me go to rehab, but I said, No, No...

2008-07-01T23:26:00.000-07:00

I had a convo with a friend from work, happily divorced father of a 6 month old. He described accurately what it is like to be in "rehab." No, not Amy Winehouse, messy bouffant, smeared runny eyeliner, drunkenly balancing an infant, kind of rehab. He described it as recovering from a life-threatening disease in which only a transplant surgery will save your life. Rehabilitation to relearn what it is like to use this newly replaced limb. It takes patience and sacrifice and hope. You can't just go out and school some foo's on the b-ball court, you have to take it easy, you must believe and nourish and heal and rest, all the while pushing to get better and stronger.

My rehab tonight consisted of art, a beautiful skyline, incredible husband and a perfect sunset:

Tuesdays on the Terrace at the Museum of Contemporary Art

The museum was inspirational

Chicago grown artist, Jeff Koons returns with a limited time exhibit. It was awe-inspiring!

Let the healing begin.

ob la dee ob la dah

2008-07-01T10:46:00.000-07:00

Life goes on.

It is said that the mythical bird, the phoenix, builds a nest in its old age and bursts into flames only to be reborn as a strong, youthful, new and improved version of itself.

I have never related to that age-old legend. Until now.

I quit.

I quit the entire life I have built here in Chicago. The job, the friends, the family, the drinking, the late nights, the drama, the piles of cash... gone.

I don't know what will come on the other side of this change but I do know I have never been prouder of my accomplishment. Graduating magna cum laude from UCSD with an honors in Psych is nothing compared to the times that test your true character. To overcome this next phase will surely be nothing short of heroic. The sacrifice it takes to be a married woman is a beautiful thing and I forgot the point.

In fact, I live my life in an entirely new kind of "crotch." Not that 6-way intersection filled with hipsters gracefully brushing their bangs out of their eyes as they slide across Milwaukee listening to ipods filled with bands with ironic song titles. No, I am living in the "crotch that is life." That place where I can't possibly interact with a mind, heart or embrace with loving arms, nor can I walk myself out of this mess with well-grounded legs. Nope, I live life in that region where all I can to is create waste and fuck it all up. The crotch.

So now what?

I rebuild. Again. This time the right way. I finally have my priorities straight. And I'm not gonna lie, it feels pretty darn great.

"The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well."

~~Ralph Waldo Emerson

They're baaaaaack

2008-06-30T11:24:00.000-07:00

When I was a kid, people always mistook me for Heather O'Rouke, the little girl from Poltergiest.

They would stop me on the streets as a naive 7-year-old and frantically shook their finger at me and ask me to "do the thing from that ghost movie." At first my parents didn't know what to think, but I got the request so many times I eventually gave my audience what they were asking for right on cue.

"They're Baaaaaaaack."

And so am I.

What's Your Dad Like?

2008-06-16T09:05:00.000-07:00

Please tell me you have seen this video before...

Classic. Just seemed appropriate for father's day.

Happy DAD'S DAY to the greatest dads in the world!

yea, that's right. they are the greatest. and by greatest I mean better than yours. what now? yea, you better walk away. biotch.

Blogger's Block

2008-06-13T10:28:00.000-07:00

I have it. Stay away. It might be contagious...

Blogger's Block.

The dangerous and crippling disease of having NOTHING to blog about.

Well, actually, now that I think of it, I really have had a busy week. Redecorating, karaoke, shopping, busy at work, date with Josh, beautiful weather that turns to crap the minute I walk out the door, watched movies, preparing for moms arrival, TOP CHEF finale, went out with friends....

Wow! That's actually a really great week. So why no blogs to share?

oh, I know why. No one cares.

Or at least it seems that way. I write extensive blogs about amazing adventures, or short blogs giving updates, I get personal, or leave it surface, I leave special ones up for a couple of days thinking maybe they just need a couple days to check it, or I try to bust out a few at a time giving readers something new. But still I can't help but think I am constantly putting my perspective out there and letting it float away into space, only to never hear the echo of it bouncing back to me. Maybe I am just not touching people in the way that I think I am...

Which begs the question: Why do we blog? Or more specifically why do I blog?

At first it was to occupy my time. Working a night job, waking up alone in a quiet house, constantly searching for my purpose- all motivating factors. Then, it was because all the feedback I was getting. I mean this silly forum for my thoughts was actually being read, and dare I say... LOVED. And I'm still there in that addictive first stage of discovering the blogging world. You know, checking back constantly, re-writing until its perfect, commenting like crazy, expanding your sphere. But it just feels like it plateaued (wow, that took me 6 tries to spell that one right!).

The worst part, I actually started to believe I could be a writer. I started looking into schools and classes around here to see if this blog thing could parlay into a passionate career. I actually started to dream again. But that was blocked this week.

I don't know. I guess this is all part of it. Figuring out who I am, while figuring out what an audience of readers actually wants to indulge their sweet time reading, let alone the time it takes to comment.

I know it's an egomaniac cycle. I write, people comment, people comment, I write some more. And I know we all say it's because we just want to put our most precious ideas out there because it is some kind of "release." But I'm willing to fess up. I want the validation. I want the feedback, critical or supportive. I want to be heard!

But that has always been me, maybe you all do it just to "release."

So I will continue to blog because I know you are out there. And I know you like to see what I've been up to. And I know you sometimes smile at my silly ideas. And I know you care about what adventure I have been on this week. And I know you are disappointed when I haven't posted in a few days. And I know this post makes you feel guilty. But I just have to remind you, that you have made me feel a little sad too, because instead of seeing you comment on my page too, like you do everyone else's, I have to just believe you read mine and enjoy it.

Irony is a bitch

I'm glad you were born

2008-06-08T10:44:00.000-07:00

Josh's birthday was yesterday!!! YAY!!!!

We went to the best festival Chicago has to offer....

RIBFEST!!!!!

Yummy yum yum and a finger lickin' good!

Decorating Cents

2008-06-06T11:49:00.000-07:00

Countdown begins. My mom comes to visit in 2 weeks!

She is bringing my amazing step-dad and 7-going-on-8 sister to see this crazy town I have fallen head over heels for. This is their first time in Chi-town and despite knowing they will love it no matter what, I have this innate pressure to impress. Something about being a new wife and showing off your very first home for the very first time to your very incredible mother.

My mom has always had a background static of HGTV in our home growing up. Even now my sister willingly turns to "Trading Spaces" or "Room by Room" if Nicktoons or Disney Channel do not quench her thirst for fatuous entertainment.

So with that circulating in this tireless brain of mine....

I NEED YOUR HELP!

I have this idea to redo my kitchen and really make it match summertime in Chicago.

Inspiration: Bright, happy, GREEN, Fresh, garden (but not veggie or flower theme, more herb garden). I found this Ready-to-Hang at Ikea and need some ideas to design around it.

These are photos of my kitchen right now. It was meant to reflect our love for world travel. It was a cute idea, but it just didn't come together quite right. So back to square one.
View from kitchen out into living/dining room

Coffee stand to the left, and a whole rear wall to really make it stand out.

Needs something to brighten this area up

Handmade "bon voyage" lettering, cute but gotta be replaced with something better.

Potrack made from a gate featured in our wedding!
Not going anywhere, but does need a facelift. Any ideas?

Oh yea, and it has to be on a budget. I know some of you have got some serious "Decorating Cents" out there (ah-hem Design Gal). So give me some feedback, I'm all ears! Thanks!

In Search of Friendship: The Challenge

2008-06-05T10:56:00.000-07:00

On the hunt for the quintessential photo to portray "friendship" as I see it.

Crystal and I head off to Navy Pier, for some good ol' fashioned Chicago fun! Navy Pier is a Chicago tourism favorite, filled with silly shows, thrilling speedster boat rides, carnival style booths and games, sweet treats and most recognizable, a ferris wheel the height of a 14 story building! I took this one! It's my favorite of the day.

It was a foggy day with horrible photography conditions, so was not too hopeful about winning that sweet t-shirt up for grabs, in fact I almost gave up altogether. I mean, these kids are crazy talented and nothing I could snap would ever stand up to their sweet skills (said with a Dynamite-esk slur).

However, I already committed myself, so I continued with the challenge. First off, Crystal and I looked everywhere for a chance to enjoy a couple of mojitos, but settled for some delicious fried dough.... mmmmm delicious! Until the warf flies started landing in the sticky chocolate syrup... needless to say, we tossed our "friendship dessert" into the trash. Back to the drawing board.
Then we had a little fun in front of the funhouse mirrors. I smell friendship!
But Crystal didn't really enjoy the way the mirror accentuated our hips! ;)

And finally, already running late for work, we both agreed the adventure wouldn't be complete without a ride on the famous ferris wheel!

The most beautiful view of the Chicago skyline, and I had to be on the top of the ferris wheel on the perfect "June Gloom" day. So frustrating! I felt defeated as I had looked all day for the perfect opportunity to present itself. And then I noticed this tagged on the seat of the gondola. It couldn't have defined the day any better...
I smiled at Crystal and she smiled back. Ok, so maybe I am limited in my photo skills and maybe Chicago NEVER provides the right lighting for a perfect photo shoot, but I have quickly learned that it never seems to matter. It's all about the Adventure!

And of course no Adventure would be complete without a souvenir:

Pretty sweet tattoo, huh mom?

So here it is, my exposaroonie submission, Friendship is...

I did it, you should too!

Friendship is...

2008-06-04T10:50:00.000-07:00

This week's Exposaroonie challenge!
And I am sooooo excited.

Exposaroonie is an incredible website started by my friend Ashley Forrette and her "bestest blogging buddy" EmilyPie. It gives weekly photography challenges to test your skills and amazing articles and tips and links for any aspiring novice or inspired expert.

Every week I check out the challenges, vote for my faves, and even try to capture the moment with my little camera, but I always chicken out. I never feel like mine is good enough to submit for the world to see.

But this week I am submitting no matter what! Why? Because this one is what I'm all about. I don't know much about myself in my 24 years of life experience. But what I do know is I have some of the best friends in the world and cherish them with every fiber of my being!!!

Sooo, with out further delay, Crystal and I are off to Navy Pier! I smell Adventure...

Rain, rain, go away...

2008-06-03T10:12:00.000-07:00

AND NEVER COME BACK!

It's raining in Chicago today. Really hard.
It was 78 degrees yesterday and I cruised around the town on my bike enjoying the beautiful day. But now, stuck inside and pouting.

Where the heck have you been?!?!

2008-05-30T10:10:00.000-07:00

Where have I been you ask?
Oh, just a little something I like to call...

ROAD TRIP!!!

Crystal and I hopped on the road, Tuesday night for fun and adventure in that crazy mitten-of-a-state, Michigan!

It all started when I spent the day at the DMV getting a new drivers license. Crystal kept me company while I waited patiently for my number to be called. Even making light hearted jokes and giving a hopeful smile, those DMV workers do not crack! It must be a hiring requirement on the application, "Are you a US Citizen?, Have you worked under any other name?, Do you wake up every day wishing you were dead?" At least I felt accomplished walking away with a new ID! Yay!

Anyway, after much frustration there, we headed to the Art Institute museum for some calming time in the Monet exhibit and a little French Impressionism. Only problem, they MOVED EVERYTHING! All of our favorites were gone! Even this one.

We walked away feeling disheartened and confused. Why Chicago? What did we do that you feel you have to punish us?

Crystal turns to me over our much needed prescription of 2 Grey Goose martinis and says, "I know, let's get outa Chicago. We should go to Michigan. My best friend, Brendan is in Lansing for a couple of days."

And so we did it. Spontaneous Road Trip!

I got off work at 10 pm, kissed Josh goodbye and hit the road by 11pm. Only 5 hours to Lansing, the capital city!

So we are flying! Making great time, dancing and singing to Madonna on the radio, laughing in disbelief that we are this spontaneous and all of a sudden... lights flashing!

I pull over and explain to the Michigan police officer that I didn't realize I was going so fast. He looks at us suspiciously. Two crazy girls driving way too fast to Michigan? Needless to say, my charming smile did not get me out of a speeding ticket. However, I did not anticipate this little gem. In the state of Michigan, the cops take away your license until you pay the fine! Yes, you heard me correctly, the state of Illinois just issued me a license not 12 hours before the state of Michigan took it away. Let me tell you, I was in quite the "state" after that!

Whatever, no highway patrol is going to ruin our fun...

We arrive in Lansing and for the rest of the trip is was nothing but pure unadulterated fun! But more than fun, it was a learning experience for me.

5 things I learned about Michigan:

1. Fish need ladders to swim upriver, just don't walk underneath, it's the worst kind of bad luck, the wet kind.

2. "The early bird really does get the worm." Not figuratively, I actually saw a robin catching a worm from the grass at 5 am. They are not kidding around in Michigan.

3. Buses are clean and friendly. Something very new to me...

4. The Michigan circle tour sounds like a nice scenic drive, but all Michiganites know better.

5. Cravings for coffee are not common in Michigan. They have a slower, simpler way of life and don't need caffeine pumping through their bloodstreams at all times. Not like us "city girls."

6. Taverns on the main street advertise that they are "Fun for the Whole Family!" I guess if you name a beer hall after mythical creatures, you gotta have your own angle, right?

7. Lansing has the most gay bars per capita than any other city in Michigan. Thank you for that little tidbit, Dennis.

8. Don't tell me these peeps don't know how to have a good time!

9. Damn it! They take your freaking ID away and make you go through the hassle of paying it back in the form of a money order! So inconvenient.

10. On the way back, watch out for deer on the road. They are not joking when they say "I'll look on the right side, you look on the left." I laughed at that comment... until I almost hit one in the middle of the highway!

All in all, the trip was amazing and I want to thank Brendan and Dennis for really showing us the town. We loved every minute!

Super Pussy

2008-05-23T09:56:00.000-07:00

Duuuuuuuude!
Who knew Robert Downey Jr. could be such a BADASS!?!?! (pronounced buh-DAS)
Well, actually I guess we all have seen the mugshots....

It is kinda BADASS if you are smiling like a fool right before you become Bubba's new girlfriend.

But seriously, Iron Man starring Robert Downey Jr. as a womanizing millionaire turned egotistical superhero was absolutely amazing! Now, THIS is what I call BADASS!

Now, I have no comic book knowledge and no real reason to be an authority on any characters created by the imaginative geniuses over at Marvel, or Image or DC.... But I am willing to bet that I can come up with a reason why Iron Man is waaaaay better than any other super hero.

Go ahead. Challenge me.

*WARNING: The opinions expressed by this blogger do not necessarily reflect those of her husband who will be furiously appalled by this ignorant breakdown of his childhood heroes. You have been warned.*

Batman?

phsh. who do you think you are? Batman? No challenge. I mean sure he is devilishly handsome millionaire, Bruce Wayne, but that's the same characteristics as Iron Man's alter ego, Tony Stark. However, Tony constantly sleeps with promiscuous women and parties on his private plane! Way cooler millionaire. Plus, Batman is mentally disturbed. I mean, the guy has got issues. Fighting crime because his parents were murdered and he's afraid of some winged creature the size of a tennis ball! Pussy. Next.

Spiderman?

C'mon. Where's the fun. This guy is not even ripped for one. And two, why protect your alter ego, if that life sucks. No family left (R.I.P. Uncle Ben, I always have loved the convenience of your 90 second rice). Works like 3 jobs and still can't make ends meet. Dingy, crappy apartment. His girlfriend is boring, I mean, does Kirsten Dunst have any other facial expression besides this?

What are you even looking at M.J.?
Oh no. You're conflicted super hero buddy is in trouble again?
Or is that blank stare because you can't figure out whether you want cheeze-filled pretzels or Mrs. Field's mini cookies from the vending machine?

Or maybe just a little too much Mary Jane....

Plus, what superhero can wear a tight one piece unitard and not have an outline of his rippling 8-pack abs or his bulging junk. C'mon. No fun. Pussy.

Superman?

Not even going to get into this one. I'll just say the two words on everyone's mind.

SUPER PUSSY.

You know I'm right.

Gimme more. Seriously. Give me a superhero, I will find a way to prove that Iron Man is undeniably the greatest BADASS that has ever saved the world!

I Love You More. By Josh and Shannon Kenyon

2008-05-21T11:44:00.000-07:00

I don't know if I believe in soul mates.
At least not in the traditional sense.

Beginning of this year, I read a book that changed my perspective on life. My brother bought me a copy of Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert for Christmas of last year.

It is the story of a recent divorcee who travels the world in search of herself and through her inspirational journey learns to indulge, inspire and interconnect the two. There was a line in it that I will never forget:

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. "
~eat, pray, love by: Elizabeth Gilbert (pg 149)

Josh is not my soul mate. He is my soul compliment. He is that balance I need everyday in my life to both smack me awake and also coddle me to sleep. I am sure of it.

Why? Because of our perfect anniversary gifts.

I had been toiling for weeks on what to get him and decided it would be best if we both do something from the heart. No money spent. Something creative and meaningful.

As always, he knew right away what he was going to do and had it finished before I even thought of starting mine.

What can I do to make him understand how deeply I love him and how much I appreciate all he has done for me? What could possibly be done to show him how much he is a part of me? And most importantly, how can I OUTDO whatever he has already made me....? ;)

And then I wrote a blog. And then I wrote in my journal. And then I wrote a letter to my 7 year old sister. AND THEN I REALIZED--- HOLY CRAP! I AM A WRITER!

So I knew. I would sit down and write him a story. An innocent story of our love.

Now, mind you, I have done children's books before for friends and family as gifts, but I always had Josh's help on the illustration and design part. Now I would be doing it all by myself just for him! Oooo I was so excited! He would be so proud of me to know that I worked so hard to make him the perfect little book with pictures and everything!

I got right to working. It just started flowing out of me. So perfect, so powerful, so beautiful! I had never written anything better in my life. Ever.

I thought about it for a day and then got to work on the printing. I chose the perfect typeface, Archer Book (he is a graphic designer so this is a VERY important step), laid it out in perfect page format, chose the perfect colors, and clicked "Print."

Shit! Nothing is happening! SHIT!

I reach for the phone to ask for his help.

Ahhhh! I can't call him! I have to figure this out on my own! And damn it, time is running out! I have spent all day making stupid hard boiled eggs that look like a blissfully married couple, that I have no time for troubleshooting! AHHHHHHH!

"Print." Now the pages are printing, but it is printing up crooked on every page. The book ended up being a disaster. All this time, I was even sort of relieved that the printing turned out so bad, because to be honest, I just can't illustrate well enough to match the beautiful writing I did. It gave me a good excuse to figure out a better way to show him what he means to me through illustration. I just needed to stall a bit.

Well, plan B. I wrapped up the incomplete version (which is something us virgos- the ultimate perfectionists- never do) and decided to tell him it was my rough manuscript that I would finish with his help. Turns out I couldn't do it without him, anyway.

I apologize all day to him through texts:

ME: I'm so sorry. I just wanted your gift to be perfect.

Josh: I'll love it no matter what babe. I know its from your heart.

I gave it to him at dinner and I apologize all through the night for giving him an incomplete gift... We both cry at the beauty of the writing and how happy we are to have made it through the first year of married life. But he just gives me a coy smile all through dinner and says, "Just wait 'til you see mine."

We arrive home and he presents me with the perfect compliment to my book.

A book. No writing, no plot. A small handmade picture book. Illustrations by Josh Kenyon.

I wrote a book that was missing pictures. He illustrated a book that was missing words.

Not soul mates. Soul Compliments.

Here is our Anniversary book, in each of their parts:

I Love You More.

By: Shannon Kenyon

A teenage boy turns to his teenage girl and says these simple words:

I love you more than anything,
More than everything, I love you.

She gives him a coy smile,
Are you sure? Is that true?

I love you, yes, I do.

More than the Troubadour and all the rock shows?
More than Del Taco red sauce burritos?
More than movies and pagers and OMD?
More than lunch with the guys and Blunts and Beats?
More than cruisin’ the town in the Punk Rock Van?
Even more than a portrait of Billy Corgan?

Yes, baby girl.

I love you more than anything,
More than everything, I love you.

Really, can that be?

I love you, can’t you see?

More than sunny days and Tem’s Bar-B-Que?
More than singing and dancing with crazy JuJu?
More than the smell of the beach and the view of the bay?
More than volleyball games at the park all day?
More than the closeness of family at only a drive?
Even more than the courthouse on the 405?

Of course, my dear.

I love you more than anything,
More than everything, I love you.

Are you positive, is this right?

I love you, I do, my wife.

More than the beautiful bride coming down the isle?
More than hearing my vows with a constant smile?
More than bright orange lilies and candles aglow?
More than husband and wife dancing to “Yellow?”
More than family and friends with speeches to make?
Even more than lemon raspberry cake?

Yes, sweet wife of mine.

I love you more than anything,
More than everything, I love you.

Seriously? Are you sure?

I love you, darling.... A-dur!

More than the squeak of the slow-moving “L”?
More than a great city with a chocolate smell?
More than Goldstar and Jerry’s and a huge silver bean?
More than a six-way crosswalk in the hipster scene?
More than one hundred and ten stories of Sears?
Even more than thousands of beers?

Yep. Sure do, honey.

I love you more than anything,
More than everything, I love you.

Now do you believe I will love you forever?
More than anything, sweet Shannon, now it’s my turn to be clever.

I will love you until you have found your way.
And make others happy as you make me every day.
I will love you when we settle in a new home.
I will love you when our bellies have grown.
I will love you when we bring life into this world.
And even change diapers—

Wait- hahaha, that is just too funny…

Anyway,
I will love you until we are tired and old.
I will love you forever, as I have told…

I love you more than anything,
More than everything, I love you.

……Oh yea, well, I love you MORE!

As a virgo perfectionist, I like to have things just a certain way. But something tells me it was way more "perfect" as an incomplete "half," to the complimentary "whole."

It was a tie!

2008-05-20T11:32:00.001-07:00

Monday morning I woke up and got right to work. I was going to WIN this bento box competition. Made some rice, boiled eggs, cut veggies, carved fruit, sauteed shrimp, created a dog house out of peanut butter, marshmallow fluff, and bread....

Then I realized, damn! my whole day is gone, just making lunch! So kudos to japanese moms, but I just don't want to spend that much time on something Josh is going to scarf down in 10 seconds!

But, I'll have to admit, my anniversary themed dish was pretty darn cute!

Happy bride and groom.... sort of

I shake your hand, Melissa Denowitz.... until next time!

Happy Anniversary!

2008-05-19T08:45:00.000-07:00

They say the first year is the hardest...

Nah, not when you got this guy for a husband.
Happy FIRST Anniversary, my love! I will love you forever!

Eat My Bento Box

2008-05-16T07:31:00.000-07:00

Last night was our good friend Paul Degrassi's bday and we celebrated at a charming little hipster bar, Happy Village. Happy 29 dude! You are tots rad!

I had a conversation with fellow wifey and all-around-adorable "lifeinthecrotch" fan (jk), Melissa, and she turned me onto this crazy japanese way of packing lunches. Bento Boxes are japanese packed lunches that not only require looking cute but also include complimentary flavors. Often times, housewives compete for who makes the best bento box when the kids bring their lunches to school. The more creative and appealing the more pride, and food is usually made in tiny perfectly arranged containers and/or modeled after animals. Sort of like MY LUNCH CAN BEAT UP YOUR LUNCH!

So that got me thinking, Melissa Denowitz, I challenge you to a bento-box-wife-off! Should you choose to accept the challenge, Monday morning we rise early and send our husbands packing with the cutest, most perfectly arranged, nutritious, delicious lunch! Paul can judge, as long as he keeps any bias out. wink wink!

Eat my bento box!

Do you play with your food? Wanna join in on the bento box wife off? Show me what you got!

I want a PUPPY!

2008-05-15T10:57:00.000-07:00

All this talk about puppies! I mean they are everywhere I look... here and here and here. I want a little farfegnugen for my very own. Josh has always wanted a dachshund, just like Polly, the dog he's grown up with. But I just wanna adopt one that jumps out at me and says, "You're my new Momma!"

I daydream about what it would be like to have a little puppy to keep me company on my Adventures. I think about what it would be like to cuddle a furry little huggle-buns. I wanna have a friend wake me up every day and bark "Wake up, mom! It's a beautiful day outside- and I gotta pee!" But mostly, I daydream about toting a puppy in the basket of my bike, Koko Janks (that's her name).
How much cuter would this bike be if it had a little baby puppilicious in the basket?! AND look what I found... It's meant to be.

Happy B-dayzzle Jerms!

2008-05-13T07:35:00.000-07:00

Geez, you've got moms and grandmas up the whazoo!

Jules, my best friend in the whole wide world, called me after reading yesterday's blog and exclaimed that apparently my whazoo is packed with grandmas. I really am so fortunate to have such incredible family to love and care for me, especially since its like 50 million people!

But wait there's more.

I have yet another family I have not told you about.

My work family:

These are the people who know my mood swings and use them to make money. These are the people who have listened to me whine about 'that annoying ho' that's sucking down.... mojitos like is her job. These are the people who giggled with me in delirium after working by my side 'til 4 in the morning. These are the people who have collectively given blood, sweat and tears to this restaurant and replaced the loss of these fluids with REDBULL. These are the people who just want to see me smile. These are the people that make up my other, other, other family. These are Chaise Lounge.

And guess what, our baby bro, just became a man.

Jeremy had his 22nd b-dayzzle (that's birthday) on Sunday. He is the lovable baby of the family. The guy no one can mess with, but everyone does. He is funny, smart, caring, diligent (in the bitch kinda way- hahaha i know you loved that Jerms) and gosh darn good lookin'! Everyone knows he is quiet and unobtrusive, but not in that creepy "I always knew he would explode one day" way, more in the "chooses his words carefully" way (which makes conversations with me hilarious being that the ratio ends up looking like 9:1-nonsense:genius)Apparently, all you have to do to become a bartender is just throw some ice around!

But my favorite quality about this kid is probably that he is an incredible drummer! Like blow your mind amazing. He actually plays tambourine on this hi-hat thingy while busting out phat beats (yes, those are technical terms). I know this because his band had their very first show last Thursday night.What? oh, those tasty beats? yea, thats the J-man

Adoring fans.

Big Science. The Empty Bottle called them "fresh faced new wavers." But I like to think they were more like that moment in that consumerist, escapist fantasy teeny-bopper film "Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead" when Christina Applegate, the presumably dumb blonde who turns out having a good head on her colorfully padded shoulders, pulls together that incredible forward-thinking fashion show right in her backyard and everyone is blown away but she knew she had it in her all along...

Gotta get me one of these!

ok, so that analogy was a bit of a stretch...

Either way, these "silky jams" were inspirational and just plain rockin'.

Our baby is growing up so fast....

Mom? What's for dinner?

2008-05-12T12:50:00.000-07:00

I miss my mommies! All of them!

Yesterday was really difficult for me. I worked a double all day long at the restaurant making all the other moms of Chicago feel special, but I only got a few minutes to talk with my mom, step-mom and mother-in-law. And all my grandmas too! It wasn't enough (pouty face).

I was going to write some cheesy, sappy, heart-felt blog about how lucky I have to have such amazing, strong women that surround me. I was going to gush my love and affection for each one of them. I was going to express the utmost gratitude for all the wonderful things they have done for me.....

Nah.

I would rather ask a question that I believe defines my appreciation for the patience of the three mothers who nourished me daily.

What's for dinner?

Hold on. Let me to take you back and explain why my unique situation allows me to ask all three of them the same question, forcing them to bid for the privilege of curing my hunger pangs.

Josh and I are high school sweethearts who have been dating since I was 15 years old.
(Yes, believe it or not, he has been able to tolerate me for almost 9 years!) My mom, step-mom and now mother-in-law all live within a two mile radius of each other. So you can imagine the buffet of choices Josh and I had when we finally decided it was time to eat. So many incredible possibilities. Sometimes we actually called all three of them to ask, Mom? Whats for dinner? It was like looking at a menu and instead of telling the waiter what we decided we felt like, we would just drive to that house and wait for our slaving mother to serve us! (I know, lucky little brats)

But now I am sitting here planning out my evening with Josh when he gets home from work, and I have no idea what to make for him for dinner. I have searched the fridge, scoured recipes, racked my brain for creative and novel ideas and I am coming up empty handed.

Which brings me to the realization of how incredible these loving ladies are. These amazing moms perform this important task everyday without question or concern for themselves, without saying "I don't feel like cooking, make something yourself," without excuse. They nourish their families out of love and care and the selflessness it takes to put us before them. There is something special about making food for the ones you love. Day in and day out creating nutritious, delicious meals to feed a full family, and I was fortunate enough to get it times three! So thank you Lisa, Evelyn and Roberta, the names of my heroes. The women who were selfless enough to answer that burning question every night:

Mom? What's for dinner?

THANK YOU. THANK YOU. AND THANK YOU.

I love you all.

Ok, now that I've kissed a little mommy butt, do you think you could help me out with this dinner dilemma?... I mean seriously, its a lot harder than it looks! What are you making for dinner tonight?

I'm Famous!!!!

2008-05-08T10:02:00.000-07:00

No really. I am.

My photo, along with name dropping captions, was featured in the CHICAGO SUN TIMES!!!! The same paper giving updates on the race between Obama and Hilary. Yea, I'm kind of a big deal. People know me.

photo: Clifton Henri; Chaise bartender Shannon Kenyon with the Henry II

Here is the web link.

http://www.centerstagechicago.com/bars/

send me a comment and I'll send you an autograph photo!

Just a typical Tuesday...

2008-05-07T09:50:00.000-07:00

Adventure tomorrow?

Yes, please!

That's all she had to say.

I woke up Tuesday morning at 10:15 and sent her this text:

What do you think?
time to get up?

I am Crystal's coworker, sidekick, confidant, entertainment, soul mate, bartender, fashion project, mapquest, event planner, and therapist. But first, I am Crystal's daily alarm clock.

I immediately get up, waiting for her response, and prepare for the day ahead. I start brewing my coffee, blast "Love Song" by Sara Bareilles, write my daily blog, and begin to search the vast possibilities of Chicago activities for the perfect Adventure. By the time I am knee-deep in this process, she has just barely begun to wipe the sleep from her eyes. Crystal is always slower than I am (who isn't). But not in the "short bus" kinda way, in the "always stop and smell the roses kinda way." Which gives me the idea for the perfect Adventure:

Today, we go to the Garfield Park Conservatory.

75 degrees and sunny, the day is filled with springtime cheer- caroling robins boasting their happiness, vivid tulips blushing under the warm glow of sunshine, cherry blossoms blurting ostentatious joy.

Even the "L" greets me with a smile. Have a great adventure today, Shan, it squeals as the brakes scrape the metal tracks.

I meet Crystal at the Ashland bus stop. We have to take transportation that we have never used before to venture out of the main city into the west side, where this lush garden lies. The Ashland bus is wet with old people, So this is where they all go... and we are relieved to transfer to the unfamiliar green line train.

Finally we arrive at the Conservatory and are blown away by this piece of Eden we have found.
We tiptoe through the gardens afraid to disrupt the incredible beauty.

Well actually, Crystal tiptoed, I trampled!

We wandered outside to and were struck with an overwhelming sense that this is the kind of day that we could do anything! Overinflated with power, Crystal decides that climbing a nearby tree is the perfect way to express this sense of super-human sprightliness!

Ok Shan, enough photos! Help me down! My white capris are getting filthy!

Then we relaxed on a patch of grass and drank in the greatness that we were priviledged enough experience. Crystal was so inspired she whipped out her sketchbook and began drawing the beauty that surrounded us.

Time for criteria #2. The part where we ask, what now? I say the first thing that pops out of my mouth (which is typically how I speak anyway :))

Let's go to the LOOP! Onto the "L" and next thing we knew, we transported from paradise to our very own "concrete conservatory."

We stumble onto a beautiful city cafe and decide to enjoy a little lunch and people watch from our patio table. Crystal evaluates the clothing and style of passersby and I ask probing questions. The conversation is filled with two silly girls trying to understand this "business world."

Who are these people? Where they are going? What is thinking wearing that oversize jacket? Why did that lady just risk her life crossing through that busy intersection, what is so important to her that she must rush into oncoming traffic? How amazing is that woman's hat?

Just then, a Chicago tour bus passes with a smiling tour guide pointing out landmarks to visitors to our incredible city. He notices us watching him on the patio and waves to us while describing the inspirational theater district and impossible architecture. He turns the mic off and yells HI to us followed by a clever wink. We greet him back gleefully. He brings the mic to his lips about to point the tourists in the direction of the two cute Chicago locals enjoying the afternoon sun.... We lean forward in anticipation. C'mon, dude, do it, we dare you. He laughs and stops himself from the inevitable embarrassment that would ensue and gives us a smile and a shrug.

We were this close (this is where "wild gestures" from criteria #5 would come into play) to being a sight to see on the Chicago double-decker bus tour! Now THAT'S an Adventure! (with a capital 'A')

I arrived carelessly late to work. I had a huge goofy grin on my face, a bunch of incredible pics, a really good story to relive, oh yea, and a souvenir. Crystal and I commemorated the day in the last impulsive minute before I walked into work. Some homeless man had set up a makeshift jewelry shop on the streets, hoping to lure passing fools into paying for his poorly made goods. We stopped and just knew. Together we picked out matching leather bracelets. Bracelets that don't symbolize fashion or status or wealth. They were our souvenirs to remind us to really LIVE LIFE.

Every day is a potential Adventure. You just gotta have an alarm clock to make it happen.

How to have an ADVENTURE

2008-05-07T08:57:00.000-07:00

Greatest day ever!

Crystal and I had an amazing, much-needed female bonding day. That doesn't mean we painted each others toe nails and brushed each others hair and dared to call up radio stations and dedicate songs to the cutest boys we know...
We had an ADVENTURE! She and I use that word a lot to describe our exciting Chicago days, but today I got to thinking, what makes it an "adventure" and not just a great day? I think I have narrowed it down to a list that allows even you, to have your very own adventure at home.

Criteria for a typical Shan/Crystal adventure:

1. Must have an idea, of where you are going to spend the day, but, not be restricted to that idea if something else arises.

2. Always keep a fresh eye out for any changes in environment that may facilitate a new twist in the adventure. And you MUST be open to any suggestions the other one might bring up (this rule more applies to Crystal, those of you that know me, might have an idea that I am usually the one who says something like, "Look over there, it's an alien space ship! Let's go in it!" and believe it or not folks, she has never once said "no way." Hence, she is now circling the moon! oops! haha)

3. Must incorporate strangers into the day. Whether it is a flirtatious conversation with our slovenly and care-free waiter, Marty, or lending a helpful hand to the crazy man pulling a chair up the escalator, strangers of the city are an important part to every adventure. They bring an added dimension to the story and hopefully we have passed on a bit of happiness to their day too!

4. Souvenirs! This one is more Crystal's rule. I don't know if she even realizes that she does this, but everywhere we go, she picks up a pamphlet, saves the receipt, draws a picture or buys a keepsake. THEN, (this is the important step 2 to the fourth rule) we see our other friends and she casually brings out the item to show off. When they ask "What the heck is that?!" she gives me a sideways glance and begins to unravel the story of our great Crystal/Shan adventure, which leads into the fifth criteria...

5. You absolutely MUST tell the story of the adventure, or else it's like it never happened. And I don't just mean tell it in bullet points, it's about creating a legacy. I mean, you gotta get up out of your chair and act it out. You gotta raise your voice until your managers shush you and scold you "Shannon! Shut up! We are working!" You gotta wave your arms wildly and often hop up and down in excitement. You gotta use alternate voices so the listener really understands the extent of weirdness of the homeless man on the subway. You gotta relive the best parts of your day for the listener, so that their only response can be....

Why didn't I get invited?

So, after that intro, wanna hear about my day yesterday?

Recipe for disaster

2008-05-06T09:02:00.000-07:00

Ok,
I'll admit.
I am NOT a baker. I mean, I can get on the stove and whip up some easy butternut squash spaghetti or shrimp fajitas or zucchini wrapped halibut, but cookies. They are beyond me.

It all started out so well. I had a pre-made Christmas cookie package with all the dry ingredients that I had avoided making all year. It's kinda hard to follow the precise baking directions when you have lost the recipe (mistake #1). So I guessed on the rest of the wet ingredients that were needed, 2 eggs, 2 sticks butter, teaspoon vanilla.... that all sounds about right (mistake #2). Too bad I guessed based on a chocolate chip recipe rather than a chocolate cookie recipe (mistake #3).

So now I have gotten this far in the baking process, there's no turning back now... I will talk you through the rest of my instructions so you too can make these delicious treats at home. Toss it in the oven for a guesstimate of about....oh I don't know, maybe 11 minutes, no make that 13 (mistake #4) Wait impatiently.

Serve immediately to distracted husband and do not tell him of your many baking faux pas! Check his facial expression while eating so as to be sure he will not die, then casually ask, what do you think?

uh, they're good babe... no thanks, I don't really feel like having another.

So now I have a full batch of chocolate chip cowpies. yuck! Hey, I have an idea, maybe my landlord would appreciate a treat. I have been trying to butter him up, to convince him to let us get a dog... mwaaahahahaha!

Great Wall of Kenyons

2008-05-04T20:57:00.001-07:00

We love Sundays. Josh and I have the whole day to do everything we could possibly want to do. I make sure we sleep in, Josh makes sure we get out of the house, I make sure we clean, Josh makes sure we get in some good snuggle time. But tonight, Chinatown.

Dinner at our favorite restaurant, Lao Sze Chwan with friends. The owner of the restaurant was our server and took special care of us! Thanks for the recommendations Tony!

Then we get home early and eat popsicles, watch hockey, and prepare for the week! Ahhhh, I LOVE Sundays!

life in the crotch

2008-05-02T10:36:00.000-07:00

So I googled my blog, (I know Mom, waaaaaaay too much time on my hands, I will find something better to do with my time!) and this photo came up:

Damn it! Really google? THIS is what you give me?

What an anticlimactic end to a great conversation. You see, I got a call from one of my good friends from high school, Matt Swope, and we had a great catch-up session. Matt has always been a smart, adventurous, hilarious, beautiful guy that inspires me to be a greater person and really DO something with my life. He currently resides in New York where he works for himself as a personal trainer and works on his music (I know, amazing right?) We chatted about our lives and what we've been up to, and of course, my silly little blog comes up.

Me: Oh yea, lovin' life, livin' the dream. blah blah blah, oh, and I sort of have this new obsession with my blog.

Matt: Really?

Me: Oh, it's nothing really, just a little thing that I spend some time in the mornings doing... (Yea, like WAY TOO much time!)

Matt: That's fun, I'll google it real quick...
wait, I'm in google images, is this it? This weird lady in a life jacket?

Hold on, WHAT!!!! So google, you're telling me that more people are searching for a life jacket that straps around the crotch region, than my personal/public journal!

Someone call a doctor, my ego is bruised!

I have GOT to find something better to do with my spare time, (hence the reason I have avoided twitter!)

What comes up when you google YOUR name or blog?
...c'mon, you know your curious

Get me Milton AND Bradley!

2008-05-01T22:13:00.000-07:00

Creeeeepy... Craaaawwllerrrs!Remember this? My brother and I used to bake rubbery bugs using this ridiculous machine with the light bulb heating that colorful goop in their creepy little molds...

That got me thinking about all the kooky toys us kids of the 80's used to play with. The more I thought about all these antique playthings the more I came up with, but the one that kept popping up in my mind was the old board game of truth or dare... Girl Talk.
I did some extra research on this one because I could have sworn I owned this game, but I realized with the more I learned that I had no idea how much fun this was, and that I wish I could apply these wild and crazy risks to my own life! I found some old cards from the original version to give me suggestions on how to really live life!

OH NO!!! NOT A WHOLE MINUTE!

But then I found this one. I was offended by the
shocking dare! But not because it was crazy, or like
totally embarrassing. This darewas one that I see my
husband do almost on a daily basis. No, I don't witness
him "calling the cutest boy in his class and asking that
boy who he likes..." No, I haven't seen him struggle to
complete the complicated dare of "standing on one foot
and balancing a ruler on his chin."

No, this dare just shows how CRAZY he is!

Maybe it's just me and my life, but this wild dare
has become a mundane snack in my house.

So, I want to file a formal compliant! Get
me Milton AND Bradley on the phone! Those goons
can't make my husband look like a risk-taking,
dare-challenging adrenaline junkie freak and not hear
what I have to say about it! Some people!

Lazy Bones Jones

2008-04-30T13:02:00.000-07:00

I'm being lazy today. I wish I wasn't, but I woke up later than normal and instead of jumping up and getting my day started, I just got lazy. I have been pouting on the couch for a half hour saying "Oh man, I totally wasted this great day. I could have done a million things with this valuable time."

In fact, I have been daydreaming in my pj's for the whole day! Just imagining all the things I could've done to take advantage of this truly beautiful day! I mean, there are endless possibilities:

I could've scaled the Sears Tower

I could've wrestled a giant kodiac bear

I even could've joined a zombie dance party!

But alas, here I sit, still wasting away the day in this addicting blog world...

Wait a minute, I think I figured out what to do with my valuable time.... (being that this post took me well over 2 hours)

I THINK I'LL LEARN PHOTOSHOP! hahaha

Some things are just private...

2008-04-28T23:13:00.000-07:00

Hi there bloggers,
Remember, I am new to the blogging thing and I do my best to be sure I do it right, which is why I need help from all of you!

I just finished writing an incredible post about a wonderful, but private person in my life (to be left unnamed:)). It was an eloquently written, inspirational story, with perfect photos to go along... I reread it three times and smiled each time. But then, I got a little sad....

I don't know why exactly, but I deleted the entire thing. I felt a sudden pang of overexposing someone who may be uncomfortable with the world hearing about a personal moment and opinion of theirs that was surely meant for me alone. I loved the post and thought you all would be entertained by it too, but abruptly decided against it being appropriate.

"overexposed"
photo by CARNEFRESCA on flickr.com

So that brings me to this question to ponder:
Is blogging about my life, but mainly those around me, in need of a written consent form? Even if it is a complimentary story about someone, must I get their permission first? Have any other bloggers out there confronted this dilemma? Where exactly is that line of overexposure?

I don't know, just food for thought...

AND I DON'T MEAN "OVEREXPOSURE" LIKE THIS! (don't worry, it's not nudies!) :)

Tattoo Schmattoo

2008-04-28T10:49:00.000-07:00

Josh has been scarred for life!
Saturday afternoon, Josh met up with his tattoo artist, Patrick Cornolo, and they got right to work planning out the artwork, passing ideas, sketching thoughts, feeling out each other's style. It was amazing to see them collaborate.

Josh has been debating getting this tattoo since he was 18 years old. He has always envisioned a phoenix rising from the ashes to a new life. A phoenix is a mythical firebird derived from greek myths and legends. It is said that the great bird will build itself a nest at the end of its life cycle then ignite it where it is then reduced to ashes. From these ashes of the old life rises a new, young phoenix symbolizing immortality and divinity. In the drawing, you will also notice keys which each representing agents of change for Josh in his life: C for California, S for Shannon (that's me!) and C for Chicago.

Ready to start the process, Josh nervously adjusts his chair and Patrick assembles all the colors and sanitizing equipment.

He transfers the drawing onto Josh's skin and asks for approval. Josh looks at it with disbelief, every breath saying, I can't believe I'm doing this right now. The sound of the vibrating needle made me jolt and look away, but Josh bravely watched as Patrick began ripping into his skin.

Does it hurt?

No, not really, it just stings a little, kinda like an electric razor scraping against your skin too hard.
When it was all finished, Josh couldn't stop smiling and admiring his beautiful work of art that he will carry with him his whole life. Talk about commitment!

The most unexpected part came toward the end as I was fixated on the amazing work Patrick was doing. He caught me off guard asking what I would be getting for my first tattoo. I hadn't really thought about it and don't know if I really ever would get one, but he asked me so naturally I just paused and said, "I don't know."

He casually responds with a look that almost resembled pity, "Well, since Josh has got you represented as a key to his heart, you know what you have to get... a keyhole."

Something in the air changed. We both knew he was absolutely right. No one said anything.

Then Patrick broke the silence: When should I set up the appointment for?

The ISLAND HAS to be a time machine!!!!

2008-04-25T12:16:00.000-07:00

C'mon Colby! After last nights episode of LOST, you can't deny that the Island is some sort of time portal!!! I don't know if any of you follow the show LOST, but those of you that do, I would like to hear your ideas and theories, cuz this shit's getting crazy!

Old school Ana-blog...

2008-04-24T14:19:00.000-07:00

I found my old "analog journal" today. It was a journal I started on the day Josh and I left California for Chicago. I forgot how hard that was for me at the time until I started re-reading some of the entries. I was flipping through the pages and reminiscing what it felt like to take a risk and leave everything you know behind. This is the very first entry I wrote:

7/5/07

Today we begin our journey... Movers have taken our possessions and we loaded our car with nothing more than three suitcases, a computer, the blessed ice chest that Josh loathes so much and a couple of pillows. Tonight we head to Vegas, a familiar drive filled with memories of friends and family. Matt vomiting on Seigfreids face, craps with Jules, Blackjack with Dad- "Too Many!," alien jerky and most recently the bachelorette party of a lifetime! No need to repeat- "What happens here stays here."

Josh drives, as usual, and I contemplate life as I stare out the window at endless desert. I have a lot on my mind but I can't bring myself to talk about it. Last night was our annual fourth of July block party and all the usual suspects were present- except Kevin, Panama. It was all the same and all different. Everyone cornered me and asked about my life plans since we will be moving and we are married now. All I could come up with was this stock answer:
"Who knows what I'll do there. I could be a saleswoman, bartender, educator, counselor, Oprahs new best friend (sorry Gail)- hell- I could be the next pitcher for the Chicago Cubs!"

This lighthearted answer got me out of many uncomfortable conversations, but still didn't satisfy me- What the heck AM I going to do?! It's all so exciting and terrifying and overwhelming. I am ready for it while being completely unprepared.
My dad was jovial last night. We bopped away to "Smokin' Do Wop" and relived favorite family moments. Libations were flowing as usual- which always adds an element of danger and excitement to the spectacular fireworks demonstration! But I couldn't help but notice the tear in his eye as we said goodbye. He's not one to get choked up, so it made it harder to leave.

Mom on the other hand completely held it together as she casually waved and said, "It's no different than when you guys were in SD. We'll see you just as often!" Haylee buried her head into Mom's side whimpering, "I don't want Sisi to move!" I had to look away so that I didn't blubber like a baby.

This isn't real yet. This drive is so similar to the many times we have done it before, only the end is completely different. Tomorrow, we drive further east than we have ever gone before. There's no expectation of big winnings or drunken memories when we get to Sin City. Vegas is merely the first stop on our one way trip.

Cut. It. Out.

2008-04-22T01:58:00.001-07:00

What?
Oh, that, it's just the WORLD PREMIERE video of my fave band. Jesse and the Rippers.

What?
uh, I beg to differ. Perhaps you need me to describe why this is the greatest video ever made. I mean, just imagine the inspiration needed to create such a moving work of art. Wait, can you hear it? why, that must be the directors commentary. Let's have a listen:

Aaaaaannnnnnd
ACTION!!!

Cue Jesse. Good, keep that camera rotating, more wind, get those sexy white sheets billowing people, I want to really feel this realistic adobe mission with Uncle Jesse waking up from a restful night's sleep. Yes!

And cut to drum sticks banging on glistening pile of gems! Good, let's get that in slow motion...

And here it comes, don't rush it Jesse, rise from your sleep- ooo I like the wide open eyes to start, nice touch. Now come forward and look deep and pensive. Better. Closer. Warmer....

Fade to candles, YES! Nothing says rock like soft flickering light.
Now the Rippers... Take it from here boys! And don't play it down, I want you all to really show off your talents! Bongo man, go nuts. Keyboard guy, don't you take off those glasses even in this dark candlelit church- that's your trademark! Bearded backup singer.... wait, who are you exactly?

And just put in a couple of shots of crying babies, some toes, and a final blowout of the candle...
and I think we got ourselves a rock video!

Good work people, That's a wrap!

All I can say is.... wow. period.

Circa: like soooo last week!

2008-04-21T22:39:00.000-07:00

Thank you so much ya'll for being so patient this week. I know some people are able to post their trip pics like, oh I don't know, as soon as they step off the plane...
But others (like me) like to procrastinate! So, here it is people... San Diego!

Friday night, Josh and I land and jump right off the plane and onto our next mode of transportation, PARTY BUS BABY! Bryant and Dorothy hosted an amazing pre-wedding celebration that would knock the socks off even my husband! (not that that's difficult!)
Now, normally I would describe all the incredible drunken debauchery that went on, but I think I can narrow it down to the one photo that defines the night.

Saturday, volleyball to the extreme! We all got pretty serious about the games- but c'mon guys, those boundary lines were not even or fair on both sides of the court! Photos courtesy of Dylan Snowden

Whoa babe, those are some serious moves!

Yea, she was really an asset to our team.
You can see the intensity in her skills. :)

Sunday, beautiful weather complimented the beautiful couple on their perfect day. We felt so privileged to be a part of their special day. There's nothing like the love of an amazing couple to enliven your own appreciation for those you love!

Dylan was an amazingly helpful groomsman!

Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Silbaugh!!!

We even got in some much-needed time with my girls- Grandma, Mom and Sis!

Thanks for the great times!

Stay Classy San Diego!!!

Yea, we are the Kenyons... you're welcome

Guest Blog

2008-04-19T14:57:00.001-07:00

Hi guys!
While Chris and Ashley are in Costa Rica,

(I'm ready to join you guys, just send my plane ticket in the mail!)

Ash has asked me to post a blog on her site!
Check it out!

Earthquakes? C'mon!

2008-04-18T10:40:00.000-07:00

Early this morning at 4:37 am an earthquake, it's epicenter in West Salem, Illinois, shook the midwest like polaroid picture (for my grandma, that means it was a big one!)

I was definitely awoken by the 5.2 quake, but more surprising was to find the tremblor affected a wide span of the great plains area: Iowa, Indiana, and even Altanta, Georgia- nearly 400 miles to the southeast.

Damage from the Northridge quake.

Still Northridge. I know what you're thinking,
this is old news, show me the pics from this midwest quake...
be patient, it's coming.

Wow. Intense.... Is that what's happening in Chicago? Nope, still Northridge, 1994.

This, my friends, is the worst damage I could find from this horrible natural disaster... weak stomachs, BEWARE

The greatest tragedy of the entire disaster.
Such a waste, they were so young.

Now I ask you...
WHAT THE HELL, MAN!
I could've sworn I left those unpredictable news-making tremors back in California!
I mean, whenever I talk about leaving California for Chicago, Chicagoans react in almost the exact same way every time:

1) Shriek in horror that I would leave such a beautiful postcardy homeland. It's like I just told them I actually have another head that I hide under my shirt that I only bring out to make out with when I'm lonely.

2)Once they get over the initial shock, they most certainly always ask, with tilted head and furrowed brow, "So what brought you to Chicago?"

Now this usually is the kick-off point for my autopilot spiel that I have retold more often than I have eaten breakfast in the last 3 years:

Oh, well, my husband got a great job offer here in the city. He is an incredible graphic designer and this opportunity was just too good to pass up. You see, we have been Southern California babies all our lives and just felt it was time to see what else the world has to offer.

3)This answer never suffices for Chicagoans. Ever. They just can't understand why someone would leave paradise for the frozen hell that is Chicago and it's unrelenting winter! They usually say something like "Yea, don't get me wrong, Chicago is a great city but, the weather in San Diego! It's so beautiful!"

That is the point where I give up. They will not listen to me. They have been so jaded by winter that they simply cannnot fathom someone leaving perfect 72 degree weather all year round for well, this. So what do I do? I use my goto escape phrase...

I left California because I just got tired of the earthquakes!

WHAT THE HELL, MAN!

Oh Brother...

2008-04-17T23:52:00.000-07:00

Ok.
I know.
I have totally dropped the blogging ball.
I was doing so well keeping up on the daily blogging tasks: posting early, coming up with interesting topics, and advertising myself to all my friends like a cheap car salesman-- (Southern Californians will recognize this one:)

"Go See Cal, Go See Cal"

However, I got lazy this week. That's the affect San Diego has on people. Life just slows down and you can't help but think, "Would it be so bad if I just took care of it tomorrow?"
Apparently, the answer is YES!

Why do I say that? Well, because I received a harsh and unruly comment on my blog from an unhappy reader:

I need a new fucking blog. I read this at work instead of working and what the hell am I supposed to do when the same one is up. I mean i hate laundry as much as the next guy. But it is getting way too much top-o-the-blog press. April 16, 2008 2:19 PM

Who, you might ask, would post such a sour and brutal comment on a new and inexperienced blogger?

THIS GUY:

No, not the cute one, the one on the left.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is my brother. My snot-nosed, sharp-tongued, butt-faced, lazy-eyed, genius of a brother. Kevin.

Kevin is and will always be my very first best friend.

In fact, Kevin is the kinda guy who is everyone's best friend. He is a master of all trades, renaissance man of sorts. You like singing? So does Kev. You like dancing? So does Kev. You like surfing, skating, wakeboarding, snowboarding, biking, pogo-sticking? So does Kev. You like movies? He could star in one. You like intelligent conversation? The kid will blow your mind. You like chillin' like a villain? That is his specialty! The guy is a freak!

So with that I have to tell a slightly embarrassing (more cute than mortifying) story just to quiet down the peanut gallery. (Hahaha you asked for it Kev!)

As many siblings do, Kev and I were always causing trouble. Catching frogs in the gutter and letting them loose in our bathtub, playing "nudist colony" with Barbies and GI Joe, running on the tops of our couches like Mary Poppins chimney sweeps

Ah, the good ol' days. But, this one time (at band camp) we were probably 4 and 6 years old we got into some serious (as serious as kids can get) trouble for our usual shenanigans and my mother, with all her incredible patience, punishes us once and for all.

She yells, "That's enough! I've had it with you two! Now, Shannon, go sit by yourself over here and Kevin I want you to go stick your nose in that corner! You both need to think about what you've done"

She points me in the direction of my room to isolate myself in guilt and Kevin to the end of a long hallway between our rooms (smart woman, she knew if he was in his room he would just play with toys!) After about two minutes I hear a feeble whimpering that lures me cautiously out of my solitude.

"Mom? Can you come here? I think Kevin needs your help..."

"What?!? I thought I told you--"

She comes flying around the corner, frustrated teeth gritting, to find my brother face down with his butt in the air. He is crying because he can't seem to accomplish this difficult task she is asking him to do...

She interrogates, "Kevin, what are you doing?!"

He is too frightened to move from his post as he struggles to get his face closer to the apex of the wall and the floor:

"I can't do it Mom. I can't get my nose into the corner...

my head is too big!"

Hate to break it to ya Kev, it always has been, and with those smart-ass comments you're making on MY blog, it doesn't look like that's going to be changing anytime soon!

So freakin' cute, even for a big-headed little twerp!

That's my bro.
Now, on to the subject of San Diego...

But, now that I think about it, would it be so bad if I just take care of it tomorrow?

I HATE laundry!!!!!

2008-04-10T12:09:00.000-07:00

Laundry. grrrrrrr...
The MOST tedious of all chores. Even as you are finishing the job, you are creating more dirty laundry with the clothing you are laboring in. It is never done!
I have left a huge pile of three loads of clean clothes on my bed for a week. Everyday I go to fold and something just stops me in my tracks. I can't do it. I. hhhhhhhaaaaaaatttttte. laundry.

I know, I know, you're thinking "What else is new Shan, everyone hates laundry. That's like saying 'I love chocolate or puppies are cute or even more universal... I hate laundry!'

Well, you're absolutely right, except I don't just hate it.
I abhor,
abominate,
loathe,
can't stand,
anathematize,
despise,
shudder at,
deride,
deprecate,
execrate,
detest,
scorn,
recoil away,
shun,
disdain,
curse,

(huff...puff... I ran out of air...)

Oh, wait, what's that you say. I have a husband?
Nevermind, laundry is done. :)

Ok, Colleen Sherman...

2008-04-09T12:49:00.000-07:00

My typical morning routine is something like this: wake up, start coffee maker, hop in shower, press play on the Sara Bareilles CD, get dressed, and check Ashley Forrette's blog. Now, she already was an inspirational person to me before I began religiously following her daily activities, but now that I get to read her public journal everyday, I can't help but think the phrase W.W.A.D. (What Would A-Dawg Do.) I love Chicago so much, and our life here is incredible, but she is the only thing I honestly regret missing out on by deciding not to move to San Fransisco. :( Because of that philosophy I took her (and many others) recommendation to try this revolutionary step by step tutorial. And after all the fuss from the other girls and how gorgeous they looked (not that they weren't gorgeous before), I just had to follow the amazing make-up queen, Colleen Sherman and her instructions on how to beautify!!! (pardon my sub-par photo skills ladies, you really are all incredibly talented!)

Here we go:
I have a mix of brands of make-ups that may or may not be the best route. Sometimes I will buy expensive brand names of a light foundation but compliment that with cover girl powder or eye-shadows. I try to find a less expensive alternative so that I don't break the bank with my beauty essentials! :) My favorite cheap buy right now are those little loose mineral imitation brands from Charolette Russe, they are decent, but it feels weird to say I buy my make-up from a cheap clothing store. But, c'mon they are right there by the register, it's one of those impulse buys that I just can't pass up if it's only 4 bucks!

Step 1:
All over tinted moisturizer, I usually don't wear heavy foundation, and concealer. This is a really strange pic of me...

Step 2:
3/4 dark color outer to inner. I too seemed to struggle with this step, I think it's one of those that we need to practice...
Step 3:
Shimmer light color from inner to outer, right? I should have had the manual up on my computer while I did it, but I felt I might be able to wing it... maybe a mistake now! :)
Step 4:
Liner and mascara. A tip I got from this gay guy that was giving me a makeover one day (I know) is that you should always look down to get the tips of the lashes first and then wiggle the brush up the lashes from base of lash to tip. That way they get full coverage without clumping.
I don't really notice a difference, but he seemed to know what he was talking about and had the most beautiful eye make-up I had ever seen so...haha

After all is said and done I like to think it turned out pretty good. The Colleen Sherman way is definitely complimentary on many eye shapes and beautifully described in her blog. Girls, you were right, she absolutely knows what she is doing! Thanks Colleen!
(Had to do one more just for the narcissism trend!)

Oh and, I LOVE YOU ASHLEY!!! WE MISS YOU SO MUCH!

Cure for Monday Blues

2008-04-08T10:44:00.000-07:00

Last night our friend/singer/songwriter from L.A., Andy Frasco, dropped into town on his 60 day tour across the country. 40 shows in 60 days. This kid is workin' it. He brought us over to Lakeview to a tiny, dingy venue called Elbo Room and rocked his heart out in front of millions of adoring fans! (ok, maybe a million is a bit exaggerated.) Check out his newest album, Growth and Progress, designed by my fabulous and talented husband, Josh Kenyon and his design partner Colby Nichols- both the masterminds behind Jolby.

Such a cutie!

Andy did great with all his energy and his soulful voice lingering over the club. But also haunting and surprising was the appearance of this amazing independent band called Mike Droho and the Compass Rose. This band, complete with and upright bass, violinist, acoustic guitar and LIVE beat boxer (instead of a drummer), doesn't even have a definition for their own genre. They grasped the audience by their throats with the unique sound and astonishing stage presence and never let go through the entire set! Gotta tell you my neck sure hurts! Look out for these ones guys, and I'll be there to tell you "I told you so" when Andy Frasco, Mike Droho and his crew are world famous!

I wanted to post a video but I can't figure it out, you'll have to go to the link to see it on their myspace... I'm still feeling out this whole blogging thing. Ash, any hints?

Whale's Vagina

2008-04-07T10:14:00.000-07:00

We are headed to San Diego this weekend!!!

Can't wait to see all our amazing friends and Bryant and Dorothy tie the knot! Chicago winter has been hard on us and we are really looking forward to 4 days in the beautiful Cali sunlight.

Aside from the beach and sun and palm trees and IN N OUT and shorts and surfers and sandals and happy people everywhere, Here are the top 3 things I am most looking forward to:

J.B. Gnarlington and her amazing new apartment

Bryant's well thought out and overly planned BBQ

Slapping that snatch Colby right in the face just for being him

Where in the World Is

2008-04-04T05:38:00.000-07:00

Carmen San Diego?!

I don't know why but I woke up at 6 am singing that song.
Carmen San Diego was in my dream, hat and everything, and then just disappeared and I haven't been able to go back to sleep since.
I think it is a sign that I need to plan a trip...
The Forrettes and the Kenyons have been discussing a possible trip to faaaabulous Greece
(I heard that in the voice of Rod Roddy from Price is Right.)

Sorry, stay with me.

There is nothing more exciting than fantasizing about the sparkling beaches and gorgeous mountains and haunting ancient sites. Imagine the blues, hues you've never actually laid eyes on. And the ruins of structures that tell the story of a civilization that was so advanced that we still use their systems today (or was that the romans?) I'm not sure, but I think I have to find out...
In GREECE!!!!!!

Sorry Rod, I mean, faaaabulous GREECE!

I think, I just might find Carmen San Diego there too!

Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

2008-04-04T04:53:00.000-07:00

I went to sleep with gum in my mouth and now there's gum in my hair. And I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

That was yesterday.

One of those days when nothing goes your way.

Woke up grumpy.
Ran out of coffee.
Nothing good on the shower radio.
Only found breakfast cereal in my breakfast cereal box (no Corvette Stingray car kit or junior undercover agent code ring)
Smeared my eye makeup.
I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

Computer was acting up.
Late for work.
Ran from the car in the rain, in a dress.
Noticed a snag in my tights once I got there.
Managers are running around like psychopaths.
Dropped a trash can full of broken glass down the stairs.
Spilled a tray of olives everywhere, and right in the middle of a good joke too.
And to top it all off, I really wanted the blue sneakers with red stripes but the shoe man said they were "sold out."
I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

I could tell because I only made 32 dollars after all that work. (Thanks for the tip deuche bag, I hope you order a Double-Decker Strawberry ice cream cone and the ice cream part falls off and lands in Australia.)
Got in trouble for taking shortcuts.
Almost fell off the roof in the rain and envisioned my horrible death.
I told everybody.
No one even answered.

I think I'll move to Australia.

What is this..."blogging"

2008-04-02T08:35:00.000-07:00

What exactly is a "blog?"
Wickipedia defines: (an abridgment of the term web log) is a website where entries are commonly displayed in reverse chronological order. "Blog" can also be used as a verb, meaning to maintain or add content to a blog. Many blogs provide commentary or news on a particular subject; others function as more personal online diaries.

Online diary. I like the idea of that, exposing something private about yourself to anyone that stumbles upon a cleverly named site. I love that it is my interpretation of myself and it is optional for anyone to judge accordingly. I can be myself in the real world and the bloggy world.

So that brings me to my semi lesson of the day. I sent my blog link to my grandpa, a loud, boistrious, often inappropriate hero of mine. Not only did he love the updates, he sent the link to a friend of his and this is the response he emailed me:

Hey Shan---I shared your 'Blog' with a very good friend of ours......see below her comment -- gramps
....like they say, the nut doesn't fall far from the tree.....

----- Original Message -----

Sent: Monday, March 31, 2008 7:29 PM

Subject: Re: Check out my blog!!

This is *REALLY, REALLY* scary, Hank. Does your grand-daughter have ANY idea how much like you she is??!?!?!!!

I don't know, are we really that much alike?

That is a blog. It's communication. It's sharing. It's just plain me!

We're PREGNANT!!!!!!

2008-04-01T10:36:00.000-07:00

Just found out this afternoon!

The Kenyons will soon be THREE!!!!!

-- modified 4/4
Due to some serious confusion, [my grandma freaked :)]...

APRIL FOOLS!!!!

My Crystal

2008-04-01T10:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to the Art Institute with one of my besties, Crystal. We go there together all the time so it was nothing new, but there was definitely one moment that I have not seen before. She paused in front of her favorite painting, Rainbow, by Jackson Pollock, and just felt it. I will never forget how it made me feel to watch someone else experience art in a way I never could. It was incredible. Have you ever had an experience like this?

In Search of Spring: Chicago Style

2008-03-30T21:22:00.000-07:00

As you all know I began blogging my life this week and as inspiration I went to my good friend Ashley Forrette to find a great subject to blog for all my adoring fans! :) One of my favorites is a post about her hunt for the perfect springy photo.

Unfortunately, Chicago weather did not allow for such a happy-go-springy day for us, but we still had an adventure that I think may rival these fun and fuzzy Gopher-ettes (get it! gopher-ettes/ Go-Forretes ha!)

It all started with a 39 degree day complete with fog and haze and rain and grey...

Josh and I needed a break from big city life so we headed on a foolhardy road trip to anywhere, sans map, to see what we could find along the way!
The plan: no clue!

First we trailed along Lake Shore Drive in Chicago to see the lake, however the visibility was so poor we missed out on any scenic views and ended up on the bad side of town viewing the glory and beauty of a dank and mucky dump.

Just like Chris and Ashley, we too stumbled on a charming roadside eatery.
We drove along the tollway, and got on going back toward Chicago! Yea, we were totally lost! Somehow, after a frustrating wait in traffic and some tricky driving maneuvers by my man, we enjoyed a Shamrock Shake and looked for ANY sign of spring. So far to no avail.

Bright billboards directed us to a wine country in Michigan, but we also couldn't help but see the signs for a "Chocolate Garden just off exit 39" and "Deer Forest- Family Theme Park, More fun than a ZOO!" Uh, I'll tell you what, we found our route for the rest of the adventure. (Even if it does sound like it came directly out of a game of Candyland!)

Lake Paw Paw seemed like a promising site for spring, although, the biting wind did seem to leave icicles hanging from my nostrils instead of fill the air with the scent of lavender..

Next we found this so-called playland that Michiganites call Deer Forest. The pictures say it all:

The rest of the day was filled with chocolate truffles, exquisite wine tasting, and craps! On the way home we also stopped in at a fabulous casino for some prime rib and a little gambling. All in all, spring was not sprung but the adventure was totally worth it.

Sometimes its not the destination that counts, its the journey!

Oh, and I did come out without a perfect Chicago Spring photo to compete with Ashley's...

10 things I hate about... Winter

2008-03-28T12:36:00.002-07:00

California to Chicago: talk about a change!
Chicagoans warned me of the horror that is winter, and I scoffed- scoffed I tell you!
My first winter came and started out absolutely wonderful! Lightly falling powder bringing a sense of peace to the busy city and magic to the season.

But my haughty attitude was dragged through the sludge that is Chicago Winter and experiencing my fifth month of this never-ending season SUCKS!!!!!!
Here are all the reasons why:

1. Soggy UGGS: You'd think expensive Australian boots would have some sort of waterproof protection, but no! I can only get to the third block on the way to the bus before cold puddle is soaking into my colorful novelty socks.

2. Everlasting: Long after all the holiday Starbucks lattes are gone, winter endures. It still feels like winter, can't a girl get a fucking gingerbread latte anymore?

3. Stuffy buses: homelessness smells a lot worse when you can taste it too.

4. Grumpy pedestrians: I don't care how many cars are flying through the intersection, pedestrians will NOT stand still when they are freezing, and that makes for dangerous driving for bad drivers such as myself.

5. TV programming breaks: So just when you get all comfortable with the crazy labyrinth that the Lost writers are creating... they take ANOTHER break until April!!! How the hell are we going to know what that island really is if we can't even remember what Michelle Rodriguez was even doing on the island before Michael shot her? (What was that about btw?!)

6. 55 degrees is a hot day: It's really sad when we all put on our sunglasses and jump for joy when the temperature peaks at 40!

7. Special light bulbs: For the first time in my life I understand what S.A.D. is: Seasonal Affective Disorder. I think Chicagoans get so sad with the lack of sunlight in the winter, that we have to get vitamin D producing bulbs to help us get our "happiness chemicals" flowing in our brains... ridiculous

8. Slush in March: just when I bring out my bike for the spring...

9. Californians are laughing: I can almost hear the high pitched chuckle of Julianne, as if she is watching me put on my third jacket just to take out the trash while she is relaxing by a heated pool somewhere!

10. IT'S TOO FUCKING COLD!